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NorahH on The four cats

The Four Cats
Four men were bragging about how smart their cats were.

The first man was an Engineer,
The second man was an Accountant,
The third man was a Chemist, and
The fourth man was a Government Employee.
To show off, the Engineer called his cat, 'T-square, do your stuff.'
T-square pranced over to the desk, took out some paper and pen and promptly drew a circle, a square, and a triangle.
Everyone agreed that was pretty smart.
But the Accountant said his cat could do better. He called his cat and said,'Spreadsheet, do your stuff.'
Spreadsheet went out to the kitchen and returned with a dozen cookies. He divided them into 4 equal piles of 3 cookies.
Everyone agreed that was good.
But the Chemist said his cat could do better. He called his cat and said, 'Measure, do your stuff.'
Measure got up, walked to the fridge, took out a quart of milk, got a 10 ounce glass from the cupboard and poured
Exactly 8 ounces into the glass, without spilling a drop.
Everyone agreed that was pretty good.
Then the three men turned to the Government Employee and said, 'What can your cat do?'
The Government Employee called his cat and said, 'CoffeeBreak, do your stuff.'
CoffeeBreak jumped to his feet.......

Ate the cookies........

Drank the milk.......

Shit on the paper.......

Screwed the other three cats.......

Claimed he injured his back while doing so.......

Filed a grievance report for unsafe working conditions.......

Put in for Workers Compensation...............and

Went home for the rest of the day on sick leave............

AND THAT, MY FRIEND IS WHY EVERYONE  WANT'S TO WORK FOR THE GOVERNMENT!!

Posted on 12 November 2008 | 10:42 am

PM on If animals had an election.

Who would be the next President of the animal kingdom…

Find some answers here

Posted on 6 November 2008 | 5:58 am

PM on You dirty dog.

Dog groomers, boarders, walking services, vets, shelters, pet stores, all over the world have given us good belly laughs, uncontrolled smiley's, upon seeing the name of the business. I came across one over the weekend that inspired this post. You dirty dog. I happened to see it in Chicago. The post image is from Sandy, Oregon.

We would love to hear some of the names you wish to share with us!

Posted on 22 October 2008 | 3:23 am

mdoonan on But I'm not a writer!

Have you figured out what you are? I know that you have no idea who I am, but I too am having trouble comitting to my passions. Wondering how you have come out of it?

M

NorahH said:

So I’ve been sitting here for a solid hour and a half, maybe more, glossed over and staring at the screen in an attempt to write something without deleting it 4 seconds later. After writing over 60 pages in the past two weeks, I’d like to blame it on finals, but this has always been my problem — the failure to confidently plop down words on paper without the expectation of further failure.

It’s completely counterproductive, I know, writing and writing with nothing to show for it, which explains why my portfolio consists of a meager handful of poems and Spoken Word pieces (despite the fact that I never claim being a poet, it seems that’s all I can attest to). There’s a folder of half finished short stories I’m too afraid to touch, a collection of slightly above average blog posts for inspiration, and a love letter I wrote to an ex-boyfriend that I’d never let anyone read, but nevertheless remains one of my better pieces.

I am not a writer. I say the words aloud to hear how it sounds. I am not a writer. Writers write. I only talk about writing. I am a failed writer — a failed creative writer, at least. Newspaper articles and columns I have up the wazoo, that much is true. I am a journalist. But I am not a writer in the sense that I want to be.

It might be that writing as a journalist has impeded my ability to write creatively. I fear letting emotion flow freely through my words because I fear others will correctly interpret those feelings, and because of that I have come to fear words loaded with personal bias. Only recently I’ve been able to admit that I’m more emotional than I like to think, and as a reporter that bears all sorts of eyebrow-raising implications.

I know in part it’s because I’m afraid, period. Mostly afraid that everyone thinks I’m some emo MySpace-esque blogger who thinks she can write but can’t, which is frankly why I put so much time and effort into sounding rational and removing myself from the colloquial. I depend on the praise of others in a way that is crippling. You are my crutch, readers, especially a select few of you whose opinions matter more than they should, and I’m scared that you think I suck, quite plainly. You see, I am as needy for your hearts as I am your eyes.

At any rate, for all those reasons and then some, I’ve stopped writing — here and elsewhere — altogether.

I am not a writer. It really hurts to say those words. For a long time now, I’ve lusted after finishing a solid story, yearned for that final connection between words and essence. But I’ve realized I can’t commit. I’m too afraid to put my whole heart in it, and this stigma of being emotional stalks every sentence. I think I am being far too emotional right now, even. So until I come to terms with it, sorry. Loving something isn’t quite the same as being good at something. I just can’t commit.

So if I’m not a writer, what am I? Not occupationally but essentially speaking, that is. It’s hard to tell. All I know is: I’m not the great literary-artist-in-the-making I thought I was.

I’m just crazy Zelda who’ll never be as good as the original Fitzgerald.  

found at http://witandspit.blogspot.com/2006/12/i-am-not-writer.html

Posted on 14 September 2008 | 9:06 am

NorahH on Bullshit and brilliance

BullShit and Brilliance  (the difference is a fine line!)
A wealthy old lady decides to go on a photo safari in Africa , taking her faithful aged poodle named Cuddles, along for the company.

One day the poodle starts chasing butterflies and before long, Cuddles discovers that he's lost. Wandering about, he notices a leopard heading rapidly in his direction with the intention of having lunch.

The old poodle thinks, 'Oh, oh! I'm in deep doo-doo now!' Noticing some bones on the ground close by, he immediately settles down to chew on the bones with his back to the approaching cat. Just as the leopard is about to leap the old poodle exclaims loudly, 'Boy, that was one delicious leopard!  I wonder if there are any more around here?'

Hearing this, the young leopard halts his attack in mid-strike, a look of terror comes over him and he slinks away into the trees. 'Whew!' says the leopard, 'That was close! That old poodle nearly had me!'

Meanwhile, a monkey who had been watching the whole scene from a nearby tree, figures he can put this knowledge to good use and trade it for protection from the leopard. So off he goes, but the old poodle sees him heading after the leopard with great speed, and figures that something must be up. The monkey soon catches up with the leopard, spills the beans and strikes a deal for himself with the leopard.

The young leopard is furious at being made a fool of and says, 'Here, monkey, hop on my back and see what's going to happen to that conniving canine!

Now, the old poodle sees the leopard coming with the monkey on his back and thinks, 'What am I going to do now?', but instead of running, the dog sits down with his back to his attackers, pretending he hasn't seen them yet, and just when they get close enough to hear, the old poodle says.

'Where's that damn monkey? I sent him off an hour ago to bring me another leopard!

Moral of this story....

Don't mess with old farts .. age and treachery will always overcome youth and skill!  Bull*** and brilliance only come with age and experience.

If you don't send this to five 'old' friends right away there will be five fewer people laughing in the world.

I am in no way insinuating that any of you are old, some are just more youthfully challenged.

Posted on 3 September 2008 | 11:45 am

NorahH on Is dog flu contagious to humans?

Someone asked me if dog flu is contagious to humans? Here is what I found out...

Bordetella infection can be picked up by rabbits, guinea pigs, pigs, cats (if they are very young and housed in groups), and other dogs. It is not contagious to humans though it is closely related to Bordetella pertussis, the agent of whooping cough. Among dogs it is fairly contagious depending on stress level, vaccination status, and exposure to minor viruses.

Posted on 8 August 2008 | 10:15 am

NorahH on What is canine influenza?

here is more information on doggie flu...

While the Bird Flu is making many headlines lately, the dog flu (canine influenza) is something we also need to keep an eye on. The dog flu is extremely contagious as it only takes a cough to make it airborne and affect other dogs. This mysterious strain of the flu was first recognized just a year ago when it swept greyhound racetracks across the country and has been identified as H3N8, a strain common to horses. Since then it has been introduced to the pet population and has been concerning veterinarians across the country. It is still a mystery how the dog flu crossed over to canines but it wasn't surprising. Influenza mutates continuously and has the ability to adapt to a large variety of animals.
Understanding the Flu

The dog flu is somewhat avoidable if you understand the transmission process of the flu between birds and animals. Most wild birds do not get ill from the various flu viruses they host in their intestines. Transmission most easily occurs when they their droppings come into contact with other animals. Be sure your dog doesn’t get into these little mine piles as they can either get ill, or carry a disease that may infect other animals, or even you.
Dog Flu Symptoms

So far dog flu causes death in only 5% of pets and it is usually immature puppies or dogs that are already struggling with an illness. Because the disease is just emerging, dogs have not had the chance to build immunity to the virus and thus will certainly become sick, however most cases are mild in nature. Symptoms manifest as a persistent cough and sometimes accompanied by a running nose. Recovery takes between 10 and 30 days. More severe cases show signs of high fever and pneumonia.
Precautions to Take to Avoid Dog Flu

Try to keep away from congested dog parks as the dog flu will be most prevalent where there is a high concentration of dogs. If and when you do go to dog parks, make sure you don’t share others toys with your dog and likewise with them and make sure your dog gets fresh water in his own bowl. Upon leaving, wash your hands thoroughly. You can also wipe your dog’s paws with Nolvasan – you can find it at your vet’s office.

When taking your pet to doggy day cares, boarding kennels and grooming centers, be sure they are sufficiently ventilated and have good infection-control practices. Ask them what procedures they use when they find dogs with respiratory illnesses, whether they have a veterinarian on call, and how they notify owners of the pets.

Another note: although dogs have never been known to be of ill-health by the deadly H5N1 bird flu, it isn’t impossible for them to transmit it to other mammals.
Treatment and Medicine for Dog Flu

If your dog does in fact have a serious case of the dog flu, treatment by your vet may include IV fluids that have a broad spectrum of antibiotics and possibly oxygen support if necessary, usually in the case of a secondary infection like pneumonia. Some vets have also been known to prescribe Tamiflu, a human anti-viral medication.
Dog Flu Conclusion

In general, be sure to disinfect regularly to keep your home as free as possible of any viruses that may harm anyone. Always wash your hands and your dogs paws and keep equipment, floors and surfaces clean.

Posted on 8 August 2008 | 10:13 am

NorahH on Guidelines for cats

Doors:
Do not allow closed doors in any room. To get door opened, stand on hind legs and hammer with forepaws. Once door is opened, it is not necessary to use it. After you have ordered an "outside" door opened, stand halfway in and out and think about several things. This is particularly important during very cold weather, rain, snow, or mosquito season. Swinging doors are to be avoided at all costs.

Chairs and Rugs:
If you have to throw up, get to a chair quickly. If you cannot manage in time, get to an Oriental rug. If there is no Oriental rug, shag is good. When throwing up on the carpet, make sure you back up so that it is as long as the human's bare foot.

Bathrooms:
Always accompany guests to the bathroom. It is not necessary to do anything . . . just sit and stare.

Hampering:
If one of your humans is engaged in some close activity and the other is idle, stay with the busy one. This is called "helping", otherwise known as "hampering." Following are the rules for "hampering":

    * When supervising cooking, sit just behind the left heel of the cook. You cannot be seen and thereby stand a better chance of being stepped on and then picked up and comforted.
      
    * For book readers, get in close under the chin, between eyes and book, unless you can lie across the book itself.
      
    * For knitting projects or paperwork, lie on the work in the most appropriate manner so as to obscure as much of the work or at least the most important part. Pretend to doze, but every so often reach out and slap the pencil or knitting needles. The worker may try to distract you; ignore it. Remember, the aim is to hamper work. Embroidery and needlepoint projects make great hammocks in spite of what the humans may tell you.
      
    * For people paying bills (monthly activity) or working on income taxes or Christmas cards (annual activity), keep in mind the aim-to hamper! First, sit on the paper being worked on. When dislodged, watch sadly from the side of the table. When activity proceeds nicely, roll around on the papers, scattering them to the best of your ability. After being removed for the second time, push pens, pencils, and erasers off the table, one at a time. When a human is holding the newspaper in front of him/her, be sure to jump on the back of the paper. They love to jump.

Walking:
As often as possible, dart quickly and as close as possible in front of the human, especially on stairs, when they have something in their arms, in the dark, and when they first get up in the morning. This will help their coordination skills.

Bedtime:
Always sleep on the human at night so s/he cannot move around.

Play:
This is an important part of your life. Get enough sleep in the daytime so you are fresh for your nocturnal games. Below are listed several favorite cat games that you can play. It is important, though, to maintain one's dignity at all times. If you should have an accident during play, such as falling off a chair, immediately wash a part of your body as if to say "I meant to do that!" It fools those humans every time.

Cat Games:

    * Catch Mouse:
      The humans would have you believe that those lumps under the covers are their feet and hands. They are lying. They are actually Bed Mice, rumored to be the most delicious of all the mice in the world, though no cat has ever been able to catch one. Rumor also has it that only the most ferocious attack can stun them long enough for you to dive under the covers to get them. Maybe YOU can be the first to taste the Bed Mouse!
      
    * King of the Hill:
      This game must be played with at least one other cat. The more, the merrier! One or both of the sleeping humans is Hill 303 which must be defended at all costs from the other cat(s). Anything goes. This game allows for the development of unusual tactics as one must take the unstable playing theater into account.

    Warning: Playing either of these games to excess will result in expulsion from the bed and possibly from the bedroom. Should the humans grow restless, immediately begin purring and cuddle up to them. This should buy you some time until they fall asleep again. If one happens to be on a human when this occurs, this cat wins the round of King of the Hill.

Toys:
Any small item is a potential toy. If a human tries to confiscate it, this means that it is a good toy. Run with it under the bed. Look suitably outraged when the human grabs you and takes it away. Always watch where it is put so you can steal it later. Two reliable sources of toys are dresser tops and wastebaskets. There are several types of cat toys.

    * Bright shiny things like keys, brooches, or coins should be hidden so that the other cat(s) or humans can't play with them. They are generally good for playing hockey with on uncarpeted floors.
      
    * Dangly and/or string-like things such as shoelaces, cords, gold chains, and dental floss (& Q-tips) also make excellent toys. They are favorites of humans who like to drag them across the floor for us to pounce on.
      
    * When a string is dragged under a newspaper or throw rug, it magically becomes the Paper/Rug Mouse and should be killed at all costs. Take care, though. Humans are sneaky and will try to make you lose your dignity.

Paper Bags:
Within paper bags dwell the bag mice. They are small and camouflaged to be the same color as the bag, so they are hard to see. But you can easily hear the crinkling noises they make as they scurry around the bag. Anything, up to and including shredding the bag, can be done to kill them. Note: any other cat you may find in a bag hunting for bag mice is fair game for a sneak attack, which will usually result in a great Tagmatch.

Food:
In order to get the energy to sleep, play, and hamper, a cat must eat. Eating, however, is only half the fun. The other half is getting the food. Cats have two ways to obtain food: convincing a human you are starving to death and must be fed now; and hunting for it oneself. The following are guidelines for getting fed.

    * When the humans are eating, make sure you leave the tip of your tail in their dishes when they are not looking.
      
    * Never eat food from your own bowl if you can steal some from the table. Never drink from your own water bowl if a human's glass is full enough to drink from.
      
    * Should you catch something of your own outside, it is only polite to attempt to get to know it. Be insistent. Your food will usually not be so polite and try to leave.
      
    * Table scraps are delicacies with which the humans are unfortunately unwilling to readily part. It is beneath the dignity of a cat to beg outright for food as lower forms of life such as dogs will, but several techniques exist for ensuring that the humans don't forget you exist. These include, but are not limited to: jumping onto the lap of the "softest" human and purring loudly; lying down in the doorway between the dining room and the kitchen, the "direct stare", and twining around people's legs as they sit and eat while meowing plaintively.

Sleeping:
As mentioned above, in order to have enough energy for playing, a cat must get plenty of sleep. It is generally not difficult to find a comfortable place to curl up. Any place a human likes to sit is good, especially if it contrasts with your fur color. If it's in a sunbeam or near a heating duct or radiator, so much the better. Of course, good places also exist outdoors, but have the disadvantages of being seasonal and dependent on current and previous weather conditions such as rain. Open windows are a good compromise.

Scratching Posts:
It is advised that cats use any scratching post the humans may provide. They are very protective of what they think is their property and will object strongly if they catch you sharpening your claws on it. Being sneaky and doing it when they aren't around won't help, as they are very observant. If you are an outdoor kitty, trees are good. Sharpening your claws on a human is not recommended.

Humans:
Humans have three primary functions: to feed us, to play with and give attention to us, and to clean the litter box. It is important to maintain one's Dignity when around humans so that they will not forget who is the master of the house. Humans need to know basic rules. They can be taught if you start early and are consistent.

Posted on 8 August 2008 | 6:28 am

NorahH on Kurt Vonnegut: How to write with style

Here is very interesting and useful advice from Kurt Vonnegut...

Newspaper reporters and technical writers are trained to reveal almost nothing about themselves in their writings. This makes them freaks in the world of writers, since almost all of the other ink-stained wretches in that world reveal a lot about themselves to readers. We call these revelations, accidental and intentional, elements of style.

These revelations tell us as readers what sort of person it is with whom we are spending time. Does the writer sound ignorant or informed, stupid or bright, crooked or honest, humorless or playful-- ? And on and on.

Why should you examine your writing style with the idea of improving it? Do so as a mark of respect for your readers, whatever you're writing. If you scribble your thoughts any which way, your readers will surely feel that you care nothing about them. They will mark you down as an egomaniac or a chowderhead --- or, worse, they will stop reading you.

The most damning revelation you can make about yourself is that you do not know what is interesting and what is not. Don't you yourself like or dislike writers mainly for what they choose to show you or make you think about? Did you ever admire an emptyheaded writer for his or her mastery of the language? No.

So your own winning style must begin with ideas in your head.

1. Find a subject you care about

Find a subject you care about and which you in your heart feel others should care about. It is this genuine caring, and not your games with language, which will be the most compelling and seductive element in your style.

I am not urging you to write a novel, by the way --- although I would not be sorry if you wrote one, provided you genuinely cared about something. A petition to the mayor about a pothole in front of your house or a love letter to the girl next door will do.

2. Do not ramble, though

I won't ramble on about that.

3. Keep it simple

As for your use of language: Remember that two great masters of language, William Shakespeare and James Joyce, wrote sentences which were almost childlike when their subjects were most profound. "To be or not to be?" asks Shakespeare's Hamlet. The longest word is three letters long. Joyce, when he was frisky, could put together a sentence as intricate and as glittering as a necklace for Cleopatra, but my favorite sentence in his short story "Eveline" is this one: "She was tired." At that point in the story, no other words could break the heart of a reader as those three words do.

Simplicity of language is not only reputable, but perhaps even sacred. The Bible opens with a sentence well within the writing skills of a lively fourteen-year-old: "In the beginning God created the heaven and the earth."

4. Have guts to cut

It may be that you, too, are capable of making necklaces for Cleopatra, so to speak. But your eloquence should be the servant of the ideas in your head. Your rule might be this: If a sentence, no matter how excellent, does not illuminate your subject in some new and useful way, scratch it out.

5. Sound like yourself

The writing style which is most natural for you is bound to echo the speech you heard when a child. English was Conrad's third language, and much that seems piquant in his use of English was no doubt colored by his first language, which was Polish. And lucky indeed is the writer who has grown up in Ireland, for the English spoken there is so amusing and musical. I myself grew up in Indianapolis, where common speech sounds like a band saw cutting galvanized tin, and employs a vocabulary as unornamental as a monkey wrench.

In some of the more remote hollows of Appalachia, children still grow up hearing songs and locutions of Elizabethan times. Yes, and many Americans grow up hearing a language other than English, or an English dialect a majority of Americans cannot understand.

All these varieties of speech are beautiful, just as the varieties of butterflies are beautiful. No matter what your first language, you should treasure it all your life. If it happens to not be standard English, and if it shows itself when your write standard English, the result is usually delightful, like a very pretty girl with one eye that is green and one that is blue.

I myself find that I trust my own writing most, and others seem to trust it most, too, when I sound most like a person from Indianapolis, which is what I am. What alternatives do I have? The one most vehemently recommended by teachers has no doubt been pressed on you, as well: to write like cultivated Englishmen of a century or more ago.

6. Say what you mean

I used to be exasperated by such teachers, but am no more. I understand now that all those antique essays and stories with which I was to compare my own work were not magnificent for their datedness or foreignness, but for saying precisely what their authors meant them to say. My teachers wished me to write accurately, always selecting the most effective words, and relating the words to one another unambiguously, rigidly, like parts of a machine. The teachers did not want to turn me into an Englishman after all. They hoped that I would become understandable --- and therefore understood. And there went my dream of doing with words what Pablo Picasso did with paint or what any number of jazz idols did with music. If I broke all the rules of punctuation, had words mean whatever I wanted them to mean, and strung them together higgledy-piggledy, I would simply not be understood. So you, too, had better avoid Picasso-style or jazz-style writing, if you have something worth saying and wish to be understood.

Readers want our pages to look very much like pages they have seen before. Why? This is because they themselves have a tough job to do, and they need all the help they can get from us.

7. Pity the readers

They have to identify thousands of little marks on paper, and make sense of them immediately. They have to read, an art so difficult that most people don't really master it even after having studied it all through grade school and high school --- twelve long years.

So this discussion must finally acknowledge that our stylistic options as writers are neither numerous nor glamorous, since our readers are bound to be such imperfect artists. Our audience requires us to be sympathetic and patient readers, ever willing to simplify and clarify --- whereas we would rather soar high above the crowd, singing like nightingales.

That is the bad news. The good news is that we Americans are governed under a unique Constitution, which allows us to write whatever we please without fear of punishment. So the most meaningful aspect of our styles, which is what we choose to write about, is utterly unlimited.

8. For really detailed advice

For a discussion of literary style in a narrower sense, in a more technical sense, I recommend to your attention The Elements of Style, by William Strunk, Jr. and E.B. White. E.B. White is, of course, one of the most admirable literary stylists this country has so far produced.

You should realize, too, that no one would care how well or badly Mr. White expressed himself, if he did not have perfectly enchanting things to say.

In Sum:

1. Find a subject you care about

2. Do not ramble, though

3. Keep it simple

4. Have guts to cut

5. Sound like yourself

6. Say what you mean

7. Pity the readers

Posted on 8 August 2008 | 6:20 am

PM on CPR for your pet

If your pet exhibits signs of cardiopulmonary arrest—unconsciousness, a weak or irregular pulse, no heartbeat, and no obvious signs of breathing—begin CPR. The techniques used on humans can be modified easily to work on animals. If possible, enlist someone else’s help—it’s best to perform CPR on your way to the hospital, so that resuscitation can be continued there. Do not attempt it on a conscious animal, and always follow the “ABC” rule: Airway, Breathing, and Circulation.

•Airway With your pet on its side, gently extend the head and neck. Pull the tongue out and clear the inside of the mouth of any saliva, vomit, or foreign objects that may be blocking the trachea. 

•Breathing Once your pet’s airway is open, begin rescue breathing. For small dogs and cats, cover the pet’s mouth and lips with yours to form a tight seal. For larger dogs, close the animal’s mouth and place your mouth over its nose. Exhale forcefully enough to raise the chest, and give five breaths. Do not be too forceful, however, or you’ll injure the lungs. Breathe at 30 breaths a minute for pets under 30 pounds or 20 breaths a minute for pets heavier than 30 pounds.

•Circulation Feel for a heartbeat by placing your fingers on the chest behind the left elbow, or look for a pulse high on the inside of the thigh. If you can’t find either, begin chest compressions with the animal lying on its right side. For puppies and cats, place the thumb on one side of the chest, fingers on the other, and squeeze gently. For larger pets, place both hands over the heart, and compress the chest 1 to 3 inches, depending on the animal’s size. Perform five compressions, followed by a breath.

Posted on 2 July 2008 | 3:30 am

PM on Pet first-aid kit

Be prepared. Similar to your home, camping first-aid kit, here are suggested items for your pet's first-aid kit:

•Phone number and directions to your veterinary clinic
•Phone number and directions to the closest emergency veterinary hospital
•Phone number of poison-control center
•Rectal thermometer
•K-Y jelly without spermicide
•Tweezers, to remove ticks, burrs, and splinters
•Blunt-tip scissors
•Disposable latex gloves
•Syringes of various sizes
•Pen light
•Nylon slip leash
•Rubbing alcohol
•3% Hydrogen peroxide, for cleaning wounds
•Diphenhydramine, or Benadryl, for allergic reactions
•Antibiotic ointment, for wounds
•Wound disinfectant such as Betadine or Nolvasan
•Cortisone spray or cream
•Sterile saline, for flushing eyes
•Ear-cleaning solution
•Roll of 2-inch-wide gauze bandage
•Roll of 1-inch-wide bandage tape
•Roll of 2-inch-wide Vetrap
•Gauze pads in different sizes
•Nonstick pads
•Roll of cotton
•Cotton balls
•Cotton swabs
•Soap or mild shampoo, for cleaning
•Muzzle
•Styptic powder/sticks, Kwik-Stop, or cornstarch, to control nail bleeding
•Nail clippers and metal nail file
•Magnifying glass
•Two heavy towels/blankets to use as a stretcher and to keep pet warm
•Several clean towels
•Paper towels
•Pedialyte, for dehydration
•Nutri-Cal nutritional supplement
•Karo syrup, for low blood sugar
•Flea comb

<strong>CPR for your pet</stron>

See "Professional" topic in this forum for CPR information.

Posted on 2 July 2008 | 3:24 am

PM on What is canine influenza?

Canine influenza, an emerging infectious disease affecting dogs, has been confirmed for the first time in Illinois.

Antibodies for the virus, also known as "dog flu" and first identified in racing greyhounds in Florida in 2004, were detected in five blood samples taken from sick dogs treated at a North Side veterinary clinic.

Dr. Derrick Landini, a veterinarian and owner of Animal Ark Veterinary Clinic, said his clinic recently saw a spike in the number of dogs showing symptoms of respiratory infection, including severe coughing, lethargy and vomiting phlegm.

At least 50 to 60 dogs have been treated at the clinic in the last three weeks, Landini said. Suspecting canine influenza, he sent six blood samples to the Animal Health Diagnostic Center at Cornell University, which confirmed the presence of the antibodies in five. One sample has yet to be returned.

The disease, which usually is not fatal and can be treated with antibiotics, has been reported in multiple states.

In its early stages, canine flu can be mistaken for kennel cough, a milder condition that also affects dogs confined in close quarters, like animal shelters, grooming facilities and day-care centers for dogs. Dog flu can progress to bacterial pneumonia, which can be fatal to puppies, sick dogs and older dogs.

Posted on 17 June 2008 | 3:14 am

Margot on What is canine influenza?

What is dog flu? Is it serious?

Posted on 17 June 2008 | 3:11 am

PM on Why you should play with your cats.

America, the feline has officially replaced the canine as the most popular pet and the beloved pet of choice. More families in the USA have cats now than dogs - and the majority of families with cats have more than one feline sharing their home. As more and more people are realizing the high risks in these modern times of letting their cat roam outdoors - (the current statistics are very grim in that outdoor only and indoor/outdoor cats without human supervision now live an average of only 2 to 3 years, versus an average of 16 to 17 years for indoor only cats), in order to keep our cats healthy and safe, we are keeping them confined indoors.

It is not a coincidence, however, that as this change has taken place, the incidence of feline behavior problems such as self-mutilation, excessive self-licking, marking with urine or feces, and loud, compulsive vocalization, has been on the rise - all with no apparent physical or medical cause. This phenomenon is not limited to house cats, but is also happening in zoos, and other areas and parks where felines are confined.

Behaviorists at the San Diego Zoo, however, have discovered that simply by adding some safe, creative challenges each day within the enclosures of their Indo-Chinese Tigers, for example, keep these felines stimulated, both physically and mentally, and they are happier and live longer, without displaying some of the same compulsive behaviors as their indoor domestic feline relatives.

Posted on 29 May 2008 | 1:35 am

PM on 12 Tips for a well behaved dog.

I) Start training your puppy early on. While old dogs can be taught new tricks, what's learned earliest, is often learned quickest and easiest. Moreover, the older the dog, the more bad habits will likely need to be "un-learned". When it comes to raising and training a dog, an ounce of problem prevention is certainly worth a pound of cure!

2) Train your dog gently and humanely, and whenever possible, teach him using positive, motivational methods. Keep obedience sessions upbeat so that the training process is enjoyable for all parties involved. If training your pooch is a drudgery, rev things up a bit, and try the "playtraining" approach: incorporate constructive, non-adversarial games (such as "Go Find", "Hide 'n' Seek", retrieving, etc.) into your training sessions.

3) Does your dog treat you like "hired help" at home? Does he treat you like a human gymnasium when you're sitting on the furniture? Does he beg at the table? Jump up on visitors? Demand your attention by annoying you to death? Ignore your commands? How well your dog responds to you at home affects his behavior outdoors as well. If your dog doesn't respond reliably to commands at home (where distractions are relatively minimal), he certainly won't respond to you properly outdoors where he's tempted by other dogs, pigeons, passersby, sidewalk food scraps, etc.

4) Avoid giving your dog commands that you know you cannot enforce. Every time you give a command that is neither complied with nor enforced your dog learns that commands are optional.

5) One command should equal one response, so give your dog only one command (twice max!), then gently enforce it. Repeating commands tunes your dog out (as does nagging) and teaches your dog that the first several commands are a "bluff '. For instance, telling your dog to "Sit, sit, sit, sit!", is neither an efficient nor effective way to issue commands. Simply give your dog a single "Sit" command and gently place or lure your dog into the sit position, then praise/reward.

6) Avoid giving your dog combined commands which are incompatible. Combined commands such as "sit-down" can confuse your dog. Using this example, say either "sit" or "down". The command "sit-down" simply doesn't exist.

7) When giving your dog a command, avoid using a loud voice. Even if your dog is especially independent/unresponsive, your tone of voice when issuing an obedience command such as "sit","down" or ""stay", should be calm and authoritative, rather than harsh or loud.

NOTE: Many owners complain that their dogs are "stubborn", and that they "refuse to listen" when given a command. Before blaming the dog when he doesn't respond to a command, one must determine whether or not: a) the dog knows what the owner wants, b) he knows how to comply,  c) he is not simply being unresponsive due to fear, stress or confusion.

8 ) Whenever possible, use your dog's name positively, rather than using it in conjunction to reprimands, warnings or punishment. Your dog should trust that when it hears its name or is called to you, good things happen. His name should always be a word he responds to with enthusiasm, never hesitancy or fear.

9) Correct or, better yet, prevent the (mis)behavior, don't punish the dog. Teaching and communication is what it's all about, not getting even with your dog. If you're taking an "it's-you-against-your dog, whip 'em into shape" approach, you'll undermine your relationship, while missing out on all the fun that a motivational training approach can offer. Additionally, after-the-fact discipline does NOT work.

10) When training one's dog, whether praising or correcting, good timing is essential. Take the following example: You've prepared a platter of hors d'oeuvres for a small dinner party, which you've left on your kitchen counter. Your dog walks into the room and smells the hors d'oeuvres. He air-sniffs, then eyes the food, and is poised to jump up. This is the best, easiest and most effective time to correct your dog: before he's misbehaved, while he's thinking about jumping up to get the food.

11) Often, dog owners inadvertently reinforce their dogs' misbehavior, by giving their dogs lots of attention (albeit negative attention) when they misbehave. Needless to say, if your dog receives lots of attention and handling when he jumps up on you, that behavior is being reinforced, and is therefor likely to be repeated.

12) Keep a lid on your anger. Never train your dog when you're feeling grouchy or impatient. Earning your dog's respect is never accomplished by yelling, hitting, or handling your dog in a harsh manner. Moreover, studies have shown that fear and stress inhibit the learning process.

Posted on 28 May 2008 | 9:00 am